Touro Communication Club Notes #75

Tourocommunicationclub.blogspot.com

Communication Quote of the Week

“It is better to debate a question without settling it than to settle a question without debating it.”

Joseph Joubert, a 18^th century French moralist and essayist, best known for his Pensées (Thoughts).

This Week: Wednesday, June 3, 2009

2 pm - Room 223 – Midtown

“Impromptu Speaking”

Speaking without apparent preparation on your feet is an acquired skill. We rarely think about what we are going to say in conversation, yet in a formal situation our brain freezes on us. Practicing this skill makes it possible to present oneself professionally at all times. In business, it is called the “Elevator Speech,” one which captures the essence of who you are what you do in 30 seconds or less, the time to travel in an elevator to your next appointment. Great fun!

A Note for Communicators:

Strategy: To discover the full factual context of an issue..

Tactic: Use questions elegantly and gracefully to seduce the information from a variety of sources.

Questions and questioning have long been an interest of mine. You may have noticed that many of our difficulties derive from not asking enough – or any – questions. Some students don’t understand an assignment because they thought they knew what to do. Some doctors make medical judgments based on superficial evidence without questioning the patient.. Some parents assume the worst of their child’s behavior without asking questions. Some lawyers lose their cases because they didn’t ask their client or witnesses adequate questions.

A fascinating study came to light this week (New York Times, May 26, 2009, A10) which documented the importance of questioning. Several years ago a second year law student at Georgetown University was able to predict which side would win a case in the Supreme Court based on the number of questions asked.

The conclusion was simple: the party that gets the most questions is likely to lose the case. The rationale: a weak case invites more questions. The vultures fly over dying carrion.

Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts confirmed the results in his own study while he was a federal appeals court judge. Choosing 14 cases each from the Supreme Court terms October 1980 and October 2003, he started counting the questions.

“The most asked-question ‘rule’ predicted the winner – or more accurately, the loser – in 24 of those 28 cases, an 86% prediction rate,” Roberts told the Supreme Court Historical Society in 2004.

The New York Times article includes much more detail than space allows here, but the lesson of the questioning study is that the lack of questions presumes the “correctness” of a position. Nothing could be further from reality.

How do you know when to ask a question? When something doesn’t feel comfortable in the pit of your stomach. That doesn’t sound very scientific, but all research begins with using your “crap detector.” (The proper nomenclature is “perceptual checking.”)

With a skilled questioning technique that is not perceived as the Spanish Inquisition or a cross-examination in court, a more thorough response can be elicited.

My personal rule of thumb is to always assume there is at least one other side to every assertion or point of view. If something is portrayed as “black,” then somewhere there is an opposite “white” or at least some shade of gray.

Another annoying question is to always ask “why?” to every assertion or presumed statement of fact. To use “why” as your only questioning tool is like a carpenter who has only a hammer in his tool box.

Developing the habit of listening carefully is the most critically important behavior. But since most people don’t listen – or listen carefully – the rhetorical manipulator will continue to prevail.

UPCOMING CONVERSATIONS:

June10 – Interviewing Strategies – One of the most practical communication skills is to be able to make a positive impression in a job interview. Questions are important, but preparation is crucial. Bring your resume and cover letter as we role play the applicant and the interviewer.

June 17 – “The Anatomy of Freedom” – This topic derived from the civil rights discussion after the Carvell program. Other ideas included “Is freedom really free?” A fascinating universal subject which every person faces in some way all the time. Among many other authors, Erich Fromm, a well-known psychologist, wrote an influential book, “Escape from Freedom” The cartoonist Jules Feiffer wrote that we exchange one jail for another…Much to talk about.

June 24 – “Talking to Men” – Recently, we had a spirited discussion of what women expect when they have a conversation. Some men had difficulty withholding their own expectations of what their experience was when they talked to women. Now the men – and yes, the women – have the opportunity to explore their expectations when they have a conversation. Lots of energy is expected!

What happened on Wednesday, May 27, 2009

“Student Poetry Reading”
An extremely thoughtful group of students and faculty gathered to listen and comment on the poetry of several students. Student newcomers Miriam Jerusalem, Miguel Privott, Cynthia Laguerre and Ileana Tintea joined Pamela Sheppard, Brian Brown, Anna Indelicato, James Millner, Drani Gabu, Lorinda Moore and Frank Antwi. Faculty newcomers Leon Perkal, Charles Borkhuis, Gary Sheinfeld and Brenda Coultas joined Carlisle Yearwood, Charles Mason and Hal Wicke.

Clearly, there is extraordinary interest among students in writing poetry at Touro. Poetic energy virtually leaped out of those present. Anna, Lorinda, Miguel, Frank, Illeana and Cynthia each shared at least one of their poems. Inspired by the discussion, Frank wrote a new poem in a torrent of passion in a few minutes during the discussion.

Following each reading, the group commented on what they heard in the poem and each poet explained their inspiration. After the discussion, each poem was read a second time.

Underlying each of the poems was an intense personal passion or experience which was the genesis of the piece. Betrayal, “catching a feeling,” anger at injustice” were some of the motivations that generated their poetic fervor.

Frank’s angry rap piece described many shortcomings he has noticed in the world. The pieces of Lorinda, Miguel and Illeana spoke about their emotional responses to special personal experiences. I watched the faces of Drani and Brian who, though they did not speak, were listening and observing transfixed.

Charles Borkhuis asked if there was a special knowledge that poetry provides that is different from the world. Several took the challenge. Carlisle remarked at the degree of “nakedness” and ”vulnerability” which the poems expressed. Miguel commented that poetry was expressing philosophy. “You can’t be wrong in poetry,” he said. ”There’s no other way to express it.” Anna commented, “The poetry chose me.”

Gary offered that “You must get out of the way of the words” and “poetry cannot be paraphrased.” He suggested a quote, “That of which you cannot speak, be silent.” from Ludwig Wittgenstein, considered by many to be the 20^th century’s greatest philosophers.

Cynthia closed the session with her powerful recitation of a poem she wrote several years ago which she performed during the recent trip to Alabama. The poem is part of performance of the Respect Project of the Firehouse theatre. She spoke of being driven to write, even using bed sheets to capture her thoughts.

In a final moment, Miguel read a rap lyric he had just written during the session.

Charles Borkhuis reminded everyone that he was offering a poetry workshop in the fall as an elective. If students wanted to register, they must insist that their advisors include the course in their schedule.

Each of these Communication Club sessions seems to have its own emotional character deriving from the content and of the people present. Other Communication Club sessions have been intellectually lively and combative, this poetry session was intense and caring as the poets opened a part of themselves. We saw a side of students that we rarely capture in our classes.

Now the trick is to translate the poetry of this session into the prose of the classroom. As always, there is much food for thought.

----

Let’s not forget Carlisle Yearwood’s IDEA several weeks ago. He suggested we develop a 3x4 index card with basic Touro information on it. We’ll talk more about this in the future.

As always, these sessions are open for everyone to attend. Bring a friend and join the excitement. See you next time.

Hal Wicke