The Touro Communication Club Notes - #103 –January 27, 2010 Tourocommunicationclub.blogspot.com

Five Communication Quotes of the Week

“Leaders aren't born they are made. And they are made just like anything else, through hard work. And that's the price we'll have to pay to achieve that goal,

or any goal.”

Vince Lombardi, legendary coach of the Green Bay Packers football team

“Divorced from ethics, leadership is reduced to management and politics to mere technique.”

James Macgregor Burns, presidential scholar and authority on leadership

“Good leaders must first become good servants.”

Robert Greenleaf, founder of the Servant Leadership movement.

“The manager asks how and when; the leader asks what and why.”

Warren Bennis, pioneer in leadership studies

“When the effective leader is finished with his work, the people say it happened naturally.

Lao Tsu, ancient Chinese philosopher

The Touro Communication Club

2 pm - Wednesday, January 27, 2010– Room 223

“Leadership”

We are surrounded and led by people who have titles, but are they “leaders”? Advertising tells us if we buy their product, we can be “leaders.” Are you a “leader” if you are a single working mom with three kids who’s going to Touro? Are leaders the ones who are on TV? What is a leader? How do you get to be a leader? We’ll explore this topic and Professor George Backinoff’s favorite version of leadership he calls “Followership.”

A Note to Communicators:

Leadership Communication

This week’s discussion topic will no doubt open a number of areas of which communication is central. First we have to realize that the mere definition of “leadership’ has almost as many definitions as people who use the term.

How should we define “leadership” for our purposes? We could say that leaders have titles – president, dean, chair, general, captain, quarterback, etc. Most people think of leaders as heads of organizations. These are “formal” leaders.

These leaders are part of a vertical hierarchy – one is on top, many are underneath. This is often called the “command and control” form of organization, originally created by the Roman army and imitated by all organizations since.

But there is another kind of leader – the informal leader – who often has more power and influence on the group. This person has no official title, yet he/she is one toward who people look for wisdom and guidance. There are many in history –

· Cardinal Richelieu as the power behind the 17^th century French king, Louis XIII,

· The mystic Rasputin as the power behind Czar Nicholas II in early 20^th century Russia,

· Or perhaps Vice President Dick Cheney as the power behind President George Bush.

In any leadership position, communication skills are fundamental. A leader must

· Be clear and concise in what the message is.

· Be able to reduce complex issues to bumper sticker simplicity.

· Be able to explain the message in a hundred different ways.

· Be sure that all the members of the leader’s team are on the same page.

· Ensure that all the audiences understand the message through multiple exposures to its essence.

How does a leader make sure his followers get his message? Verify, verify, verify. Constant follow-up work which reduces the possibility of misunderstanding.

Poor communication has consequences as President Obama found out last week. He commented last week on the”failure of communication” which he perceived was the cause of the loss of the Kennedy Senate seat to an unknown Republican.

Although we will probably never know the complete back story on the Massachusetts election, its consequences have improved the Republican’s chances of scuttling the health care. More than ever, the Obama administration has to tighten its communication network if they are to succeed in a very hostile political environment.

In a way, the communication skills of a leader are those of a good teacher – one who has a grasp of the larger issues yet can explain the message through understandable details. The patience of a good teacher is necessary for a good leader.

For our elementary purposes, I would argue that we are all leaders in some way or other.

Leadership starts with you. Leaders make choices. You make choices for yourself all the time. Those choices result in behaviors that communicate –consciously or unconsciously – a set of values – trust, honesty, perseverance, integrity.

Other people observe the messages in our behavior. Can we be trusted? Do we walk our talk? We have many examples in recent political life – John Edwards, Eliot Spitzer, Mark Sanford, etc. who have asked for the public trust but violated that trust in their private lives.

We are leaders of our own destiny. Our actions have consequences. Often our actions impact on others without our knowledge. We need to become aware of our impact – our ethos – on others.

UPCOMING CONVERSATIONS:

February 3, 2010 - “Student Needs” On this first week of class, it is appropriate that we focus on what students need. This topic came up during one of the Club discussions. It was unclear which direction it could go – personal needs, school needs, needs for the past, present or future. We’ll start with a “tabula rasa” (a blank slate) and see where we go.

February 10, 2010 - “Asking Questions in Class”- I have noticed in my classes that most students don’t ask a lot of questions, other than “When is class over?” I don’t know why. I must be boring. Maybe the students have been things to do with their minds. For me, questioning is the best avenue of learning anything. When you ask questions, your mind is engaged with the material. When you ask questions on a date, your mind is engaged in the relationship. Let’s see what happens.

February 17, 2010 –“How Do You Fire Someone?” In our work or love life, we may have been fired or told to get lost. Why does this happen? Can you tell if you are going to be fired? What do you say to someone who you want to get rid of? Lots of emotion surrounds these situations. We’ll talk about some ways to prepare to fire someone as well as your options if you suddenly learn you’ve been fired.

What about one of these topics?

“Cold Calling in Sales”

“Rodney King: ‘Why Can’t We Get Along?”

“Repetition”

“Meaning”

“The Seven Heavenly Virtues”

“Why Does History Repeat Itself?”

“Heroism”

“Concentration”

“The Power of No”

“Coping with Adversity”

“Distraction”

Dean Donne Kampel on “Women & Leadership”

James Baldwin Dialogue featuring two Touro faculty members,

Student Poetry showcase

“Empathy”

“Connecting the Dots”

Role play of cynical people

And dozens of others!

What happened on Wednesday,

January 13, 2010?

Compare the notice of the session with what really happened

“Cynicism”-

It has always been cool to be cynical, especially in college. You know all these good ideas, but stay apart from them. It’s safe to be AGAINST something, but uncool to be FOR something. To show any passion, except for pop music, is just not cool. Why is that? Is being positive about ANYTHING –except pop music –turns you into a social outcast? We’ll try to dig under the surface.

For a discussion about cynicism, this one was rather upbeat and forthright. Joining our discussion for the first time was Jermaine Nurse. He was supported by Pamela Sheppard, Christopher Couch, Richard Green, James Millner, Lorinda Moore, Carlisle Yearwood, Gena Bardwell, Drani Gabu and Hal Wicke.

Lorinda included on the flyer for today’s session a definition of cynicism – “An attitude of scornful or jaded negativity, especially a general distrust of the integrity or professed motives of others.” A good definition that we all agreed with.

What are some signs of cynicism? The group instinctively focuses on school.

· Professors who give C’s. (That one got a lot of disagreement!)

· Changes in assignments or instructions.

· People who will not listen

· People who are rigid.

· My way or the highway.

· See no argument but theirs.

· Attitude.

· Playing favorites in class – teacher pets.

[The group interpreted the question as factors which upon repeated experience create cynicism, rather than being able to recognize the negative mood.]

Lorinda felt that cynical people saw themselves as privileged and others as less than they are.

Gena commented on a program she is working on where cynicism destroys the ability to relate to the people who are in most need of help. Everyone in the program needs help and training in recognizing their negative attitudes. “We must combat cynicism because it fosters and destroys the environment in which we operate,” Gena said. “It is a slow sapping of all our internal energy.”

· Our apathy turns us into zombies.

· We are not allowed to enjoy ANYTHING because someone has a negative attitude toward it.

Christopher mentioned that the parents of the kids he coaches in basketball are very cynical about the ability of other players, but their child is the next Lebron James.

· Our speech is affected by cynicism. We are not able to speak with conviction.

· The negative is more powerful than the positive.

· “Fake it until you make it.”

· The platform shoe to make men look taller – actors like Sylvester Stallone.

· You need to be a mental gymnast.

· “Dress for success.”

· Fear manifests itself in cynicism. You don’t have the upper hand.

· You put on a mask of superiority.

· People with “book smarts” lord it over people with “street smarts.”

· Cynics are funny. Saturday Night Live.

· Find humor in a situation and turn it on its head.

· SNL – Tina Fey’s impression of Sarah Palin

· Cynical about Obama.

· Cynics try to pull you into their cesspool.

· Politics – Democrats promised change; Republican is the party of “no” – voters are cynical.

· Cynicism is a powerful force which can affect people on the fence.

· The anti-Kerry “Swiftboarding” in 2004.

· Politics won’t change if the people don’t change. {How does that happen?]

· There must be a paradigm shift in people’s expectations of politics and politicians.

· What do students say to cynical teachers?

· Learn how to face the attitude with elegance and grace.

· Jermaine noted that it is a gradual process.

· Professors are in a position of power.

· Both students and professors have obligations.

Gena suggested for students to “Work the teacher.” “Work me,” she said, “but expect that I will push back.”

Drani, who came in late from attending class at his new college, Columbia University, told us that he has 150 students in his classes. It is only lecture. There is no opportunity to ask questions. If you have a question, you have to make an appointment with the professor. Both students and teachers need to build up each other.

Ron commented on the necessity of becoming an independent thinker, a lesson he learned from his extensive work in martial arts as a way of life. [Ron is a brown belt.] He has learned to think strategically. “Your attitude is reflected in how you walk,” he said.

Gena commented that the black male has to be craftier in making a response. [This needs much more explanation.]

Jermaine said that he came to the club meeting for the purpose of finding Professor Green, but found the discussion so interesting he plans to return.

Carlisle told a moving personal story of how he created a civil right group at Pace when he was there as an undergraduate

· Aware of power dynamics in any situation

· Americans are cynical.

· Cynicism makes us powerless

What have you learned? [Connecting the dots]

Drani – coming to school is a cynical experience.

Jermaine – learned that he has to work the teacher, build a relationship. There is a good and bad side to cynicism.

Richard – the teacher is taught by his students.

Pam – I am not a quitter. When I set out to do something, I do it. I have to be strong.

Ron – use the brain as a coping mechanism.

Carlisle – Hemingway – the action that earned the reaction reflects until complete

“Crap detection” [a favorite strategy of Hal Wicke.]

Gena – We have a powerful tool in humor. There is power in “no” that can derail a project.

Please Google Haiti help to find out how YOU can help in this tragedy.

---

We always have a great time exploring these issues. So often our daily life never focuses on these Communication issues. If you have something you want us to discuss please let us know and we’ll add it to the list.

Next time bring a friend. The Communication Club is always an open discussion, limited only by time. Everyone gets a chance to speak. All opinions are welcome. Here is an opportunity for students to challenge professors’ views outside the class without any homework or assignments. You just have to show up and listen and talk if you want.

Hal Wicke