The Touro Communication Club Notes - #99 –December 16, 2009

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Four Communication Quotes of the Week

The tongue can paint what the eye can't see.

Chinese Proverb

Persuasion is better than force.

Swahili Proverb

“If you would persuade, you must appeal to interest rather than intellect.”

Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) American statesman, scientist and philosopher.

“I would rather try to persuade a man to go along, because once I have persuaded him, he will stick. If I scare him, he will stay just as long as he is scared, and then he is gone.”

Dwight David "Ike" Eisenhower (1890-1969) was an American soldier and politician. He served as the 34th President of the United States (1953-1961) as well as Supreme Commander of the Allied forces in Europe during World War II,

The Touro Communication Club

2 pm - Wednesday, December 16, 2009 – Room 223

“Thinking”

Do we know when we think? Can you NOT think? Do you know how YOU think? Do you like to think? Then what do you think about? How can you direct your thinking? What about distractions? These are only some of the topics that will probably come up during the discussion. Maybe someone will know how to read our minds.

A Note to Communicators:

Persuasion

We are being persuaded ALL THE TIME whether we know it or not. Someone somewhere is constantly trying to get us to buy a product, a service or an idea. Even when we think we are just sharing information, the many and content of the message does convey persuasive elements.

Why do we need to persuade all the time? There are a lot of reasons:

· We have something to sell.

· We want to make money.

· We want something someone else has.

· We think our ideas are better than others (This one is for teachers.)

· We want students to learn. (Again, for teachers.)

· We want a better grade. (This one is for students.)

· We think we are more attractive than someone else and deserve the object of our affection.

· We want the job.

· We want a promotion or more money.

· We want to survive. (This one’s for a lot of people, especially people who beg on the train.)

· We think we deserve the other person’s money. (This one is for robbers.)

· Etc

In fact, we are so used to being persuaded that we hardly notice what’s happening. Television, radio, the computer, billboards, - all are visual and aural stimuli which invade our senses all the time. By one count, we are bombarded by some 2 million stimuli each day.

So, if we are the target of persuasion, what can we do to recognize persuasion when it attacks us? First we have to identify when it happens. There are several easily recognizable circumstances when we are assaulted by persuasive techniques:

The most frequent tactic is to sprinkle advertising into content. When we are doing something else, the persuasive piggy-backs on another device.

· A magazine has advertising between its articles.

· A computer program like AOL is filled with advertising which we cannot turn off.

· We watch television for the programs, but the advertising interrupts the program – and our concentration.

· Product placement in films or TV shows is another technique. The conspicuous Coca-Cola containers on the judges’ table of “American Idol’ is quite blatant.

Now that’s commercial advertising where we expect that advertising will be thrown at us. But what about interpersonal situations?

· The first date.

· The job interview.

· The second date.

· Parents persuading a child to behave.

· The third date.

· The boss training a new employee about the company and job.

· The fourth date.

· The driver trying to get out of a traffic ticket.

In each case, the persuader wants something – your money, your agreement, your satisfaction. This objective in a formal sales situation is obvious and buyers are on guard.

The most successful salesperson is the one who persuades without appearing to do so. One of the primary principles of persuasion is that the buyer must like the persuader. Dales Carnegie, the father of American public speaking, argues that people buy the salesperson before they buy the product. If you don’t like the salesperson, you won’t make a purchase in fact or in principle.

This is why the salesperson is always smiling – even though it looks forced. The salesperson is always cheery and upbeat. You don’t want to buy something from a sad or angry face.

The academic classroom is not immune to persuasion. Perhaps the teacher who brings cookies to class is setting a more conducive tone of learning. Students will like you and they will learn more. The same tactic works with high grades – some teachers don’t want to be disliked so they give high grades and are easy in class. The student underground knows who the easy graders are.

In this entry, I’ve focused on the motivations of the persuader. This discussion only skims the surface of a very complex topic. In another entry, I’ll talk about “how” persuaders do their stuff. It always begins with a smile.

UPCOMING CONVERSATIONS:

December 23 – No club meeting today – We are taking a holiday hiatus and return after the New Year. Enjoy!

January 6, 2010 -“Rap and Hip Hop – What’s the Message?" It won’t take but a second to get into a lively discussion – even an argument – over this topic. Everyone has an opinion about rap and hip hop. Academic Michael Eric Dyson supports it. Musician Wynton Marsalis calls “ghetto minstrelsy.” Most importantly, what is rap and hip hop saying to YOU. Come and share your “attitude!”

January 13, 2010 - “Current Events”- When we are in preoccupied with school, it seems that the rest of the world disappears. Major events are happening all the time that have an impact on your life. The question is “Do you care?” We’ll talk about what’s happening in the world and in America and whether you care about ANY of it.

January 20, 2010 - “Cynicism”- It has always been cool to be cynical, especially in college. You know all these good ideas, but stay apart from them. It’s safe to be AGAINST something, but uncool to be FOR something. To show any passion, except for pop music, is just not cool. Why is that? Is being positive about ANYTHING –except pop music –turns you into a social outcast? We’ll try to dig under the surface.

What about one of these topics?

“How Do You Fire Someone?”

“Rodney King: ‘Why Can’t We Get Along?”

“Asking Questions in Class”

“Cold Calling in Sales”

“Repetition”

“Meaning”

“The Seven Heavenly Virtues”

“Why Does History Repeat Itself?”

“Heroism”

“Leadership”

“Concentration”

“Student Needs”

“The Power of No”

“Coping with Adversity”

And dozens of others!

What happened on Wednesday,

December 9, 2009?

“Moral Decay and The Need for a Dress Code”

Here is the notice of the session to compare with what really happened

Recently, Charles Mason gave me a copy of an academic article entitled “Moral Crisis in Higher Education and the Dress Code Phenomenon.” The article reviews “indecent dressing among youth today” and “the need to restore high moral standards, integrity and decency.” In one of our recent sessions, the topic of saggy pants stirred up much discussion. Some people feel strongly – pro and con - about the way certain people dress. We try to keep calm during the session.

Not surprisingly, the assembled throng was highly vocal about this topic which is passionately closed to most everyone’s heart. The familiar faces included Lorinda Moore, Britzia Bolanos, Jean Missial, Shawn Odle, Pamela Shepherd, Richard Green, Kizzy Green, Drani Gabu, Donne Kampel, Rene Vasquez, Ronald Johnson and Hal Wicke.

The definitions for “Moral” and “Dress Code” seemed much easier to describe this time. For this discussion, “Moral” concerns an ethos of ethics. We get our sense of moral from our religion, from our parents, from the Golden Rule.

Hal shared the inspiration of the topic, cited above in the flyer blurb, as an academic article making the case that without a dress code, moral decay will ensue.

Why have a dress code?

· To reduce competition in dress.

· To prevent the cycle of “keeping up with the Jones.

Lorinda read an article from the Chronicle of Higher Education which reported on an action of Morehouse College, the only all male historically black college in America founded in 1867 in Atlanta, Georgia. The president has recently instituted an 11-point dress code for students that eliminate saggy pants, among other issues. We have Dean Leon Perkal to thank for calling our attention to the article.

The group quickly jumped on the topic.

· Morehouse is different from Touro

· It’s much too rigid.

· No one is telling me what to wear.

· My dress is an expression of my individuality.

· Saggy pants come from a prison dress pattern.

· It’s a sign of poverty.

· Not a such big deal.

· It has to do with fashion – just see how creatively we can be in our dress.

· In Ecuador, in school we wear a uniform; outside of school, it’s a tee-shirt and jeans.

Donne Kampel reminded us that in the 70s and 80s, student sought to be provocative.

· “To wear shorts for women was to say they were to cause your own rape.”

· There is a double standard – women must be modest, men have more choice.

· We do live in an Orthodox Jewish College which has dress standards that influence all divisions of the college.

The discussion continued to ramble around a variety of topics.

· Dress is a statement of class.

· Certain dress is a sign of rebellion.

· You dress for your next job.

· Dress on the job should be aware of fashion.

· Drani showed the sweater he was wearing that war a gift. “I wear what I’m given. I’m not concerned with fashion.”

· Shawn wore a suit when he was working for a bank. “Dress was designed to impress.”

· Jean learned his code of conduct from his father.

· Fashion often goes from jail to the street to corporate dress.

· We dress like our peers

· 23^rd Street and 5^th Avenue is an interesting area for the variety of dress.

· “I want a ‘fashion forward’ dress style.”

· Drani argued briefly that a dress code would reduce moral decay...

· There are very few stringent codes of dress these days.

· It’s an evolutionary change.

· At one time, jeans were revolutionary.

· Bad trends are easier to follow than good ones.

· People over 30 disapprove

· A generation gap.

· Negative images bring negative connotations.

· Drani – I looked around Touro and saw what the dress doe was.

· We are still respectful despite the saggy jeans.

· We are coming to college to do better.

Robert of the Maintenance staff had been observing the discussion for several moments. Before he had go, he stated forcefully that “There are too many followers, not enough leaders,” using several Biblical references.

Lorinda interjected to remind everyone of the Toys for Tots drive with the 9^th Police Precinct that ends on Friday, December 18. Wrap a new toy, label it for appropriate age.

The discussion continued.

· Fashion is driven by celebrity.

· Clothes are a promotional device.

· We buy into fashion even though we have no money.

· We see fashion and we see money and success.

Hal asked why there were only four women present. Kizzy said that the women were too busy with their tasks. That led to a brief contentious gender discussion that Hal said we should save for another time.

Racial profiling with clothes

Jean who works at Louis Vuitton in security sees people in the store who don’t belong by their clothes because they cannot afford the merchandise. He trains his security workers to look at particular behavior. ‘It’s the silent ones you have to watch out for,” he warns. “Pay attention to the eyes. If they don’t look up, watch out.” Shawn added his experience from working at the Bank of New York

· Decay comes from not having a clear identity.

· Dress code is all about money.

· Americans don’t know how to adhere to dress by European standards.

“Look at Bernard Madoff.” He wore fashionable clothes to play up to the people who wanted to have his success. A brief discussion about the psychology of a thief.

This was another rich discussion with many points brought up. Several themes recurred –

· There is gender conflict over dress.

· There is racial profiling over dress.

· Fashion and its impact on the way people view themselves.

· A ‘fashion statement’ is a personal statement of identity – clothes make an identity.

· Clothes can be signs of success.

We always have a great time exploring these issues. So often our daily life never focuses on these Communication issues. If you have something you want us to discuss please let us know and we’ll add it to the list.

Next time bring a friend. The Communication Club is always an open discussion, limited only by time. Everyone gets a chance to speak. All opinions are welcome. Here is an opportunity for students to challenge professors’ views outside the class without any homework or assignments. You just have to show up and listen and talk if you want.

Hal Wicke